Two Chapters here

The Gate

Chapter Three

The night my friends and I went out dancing, I met Jackson. He says he has lived here all his life, but I have never seen him. He is just a few years older than me, a professional man with a college education, good looking, and is also independent, like me. I don’t know how I could have gone all my life and never seen this man. He is handsome beyond belief. Tall, muscular, thick dark wavy hair, and to top it off, good skin and teeth. Why is he single, and how did I miss him.

We have gone to dinner a few times, went fishing at a local river and also picnicked at the park. He is a great guy. I just feel there is something about him that makes me leery.

I want to be comfortable with him, but there is something keeping me from the trust he so wants me to have. Maybe it is because I have been single for so long, and now here is this Prince Charming kind of guy.

Jackson called me last night and we talked for two hours. He just wants to know everything about me. I think I told him about me from the time I was born. It really was flattering, having someone want to talk all about me. I tried to ask him about him, but the subject came back to me. I have gone out with guys here and there, but none really stuck like Jackson seems to want to.

I do know he is from this area. He says his family has lived here for the last few generations. His ancestors came here from Europe about 150 years ago. He did mention they were buried in a cemetery somewhere near here. I wasn’t aware of a cemetery that old in this area though. It may be a private cemetery, I may have to try and find it. I’m just happy I met him, I need to finally get involved again.

We have made a date to go to a play and a late dinner this weekend. Maybe if I can get him to talk more about himself, it will settle my feelings about him. I will ask about his family and the cemetery, and anything else I can think of. That would surely ease my feelings. I would really like this to continue, but I have to fix this feeling to let that happen.

I have decided I am going to tell Jackson about my experience as I walk to work each day. It hasn’t stopped. Every day it’s the same thing, the creaking gate, the gust of wind, and the sound of a crying child. It is eery, I walk on the other side of the street, but I am still drawn to the gate, the sound, the feeling of that part of my walk. Its less than 30 seconds of my somewhat commute, but it has had a lasting impact on me. To this point, I haven’t told anyone about that experience every day.

I have thought about even taking a different route to work. I walk the same way every morning. If I walk a different route, I would have to leave earlier and I just cant justify that with myself to avoid such a short part of my walk. So, every day it’s the same thing. I will finally get used to it and hopefully, it will stop.

Chapter Four

Today I woke up, did the same morning routine, and left for work. I have told Jackson about my experience and he was very understanding. He never laughed at me or tried to make light of the morning experience. But this morning, as I was approaching the gate, and anticipating what was going to happen, my cell phone rang and startled me. It was Jackson. Just as I was saying hello to him, I thought I saw a stream of smoke to the entrance at the gate.

I increased the pace of my step, fearing there was a fire behind the gate. As I rushed to the gate to peer in, I told Jackson what I had just seen. I told him I thought it was a fire and had to let him go, In case I had to call for help. When I reached the gate and stopped in front of it, breathless from the half run, I grabbed the bars of the iron gate to look inside. I looked in all directions, but nothing was there. No fire, no smoke, no nothing. What did I see. I know I saw a smoke colored haze.

I called Jackson back and told him what had just happened. I was starting to feel better about our relationship. I needed this support from someone. My friends were there for me for everything else, but this strong male support felt good. Jackson suggested it may have just been dust or the fumes from a passing car. He assured me it was nothing, just go on to work.

I did just that. But I couldn’t get the vision out of my mind. I know what I saw. It wasn’t fumes or dust. It may not have been smoke, and I don’t know what it was, but I intend to find out. I am going back after work and look inside that gate. I want to find out what I have been seeing, feeling, hearing every day. I tried all day to function, to do what I was hired to do. I don’t know why I have to think of my job like that. It somehow takes the fun out of the challenge.

On the way home I walked as little slower. I was a little nervous about finding out what I saw this morning. I made a plan as I walked. I was going to approach the gate, look inside, and see what was in there. If the gate is open I may walk through and try to find out what is happening. This has been happening every day for a at least five weeks now.

I need to end this mystery.

I was just steps away from the front of the gate. My heart was beating fast, and small beads of perspiration were forming on my forehead and top lip. As I tried to wipe the fear away from my face, it just returned and I could feel my hands shaking. I thought I was walking, I thought I could feel my feet moving, but they had stopped. I was still steps away. Did anyone else see me here standing in front of this wall approaching the gate. Why cant I move. I feel like I’m moving. What is going on?

I took a very deep breath, and shook my head to try and get back to where I was. Why was I so frightened about this gate. What is it that is keeping me from moving forward? It took everything I had, but I got my feet to move forward, one more time. This time I was stopped in the front of the gate. I could again feel the cold wind, and hear the whimpering of the child. As I looked through the bars, my hands pushed the gate open. I could not control this action. Again, it felt like it wasn’t me, like I had no control over my actions.

This time, my feet moved forward past the open bars of the rusted gate. This time I wanted to stop, I tried to get my feet to turn around, but they kept going forward. I heard the gate close behind me. I wanted to turn and run, I wanted to get my feet to turn around, they kept going forward. Stop. Please stop. I was so scared. As I looked around, my eyes started to focus on what was behind those bars. It was everywhere. OH My God, why cant my feet move back. I couldn’t see this from the other side.